1. Sleep report:
2:00-3:00 am: Bub awake, frantic
3:00-4:00 am: Bub returns to sleep; I lie awake, trying to figure out where to buy a night-light for Bub’s room
4:00-5:00 am: asleep on the couch downstairs, dreaming that I’m wandering around the department store, looking for a night-light
5:00 am: Pie wakes up, doing her usual 5-minute cycle of chatter/silence/crying (lather, rinse, repeat)
5:20 am: Bub announces, from his bed, "It’s the Pie!" (everybody gets up)
11:00 am: after a two-hour nap and two cups of coffee, I’m ready to start
blogging my day.
2. Blogger in beta report:
I’ve been nervous about upgrading to Blogger in beta, but since the commenting glitches seem to have been resolved, I girded my loins and made the switch on Friday, so I could spend the weekend tinkering. And I’m loving it. Categories! New fonts and colours! I’ve switched to a sans-serif font for the main text of my blog. What do you think – do you find this easier to read?
3. SiteMeter report:
Apparently, if you spend the day republishing every post you’ve ever written (adding labels – sorry for the inconvenience, Bloglines subscribers!), you get a SiteMeter full of click-overs from Spanish and Dutch blogs, and blogs with names like "cutehotties.blogspot.com." Are those all "Next Blog" hits, generated by yesterday’s frantic pace of publishing?
4. Google report:
Kittenpie has often alluded to the prevalence of Google hits on her blog from people looking for Yann Martel’s novel, Life of Pi. I am pleased to report that math geeks are at least as illiterate as students looking to plagiarize their book reports: ever since my post on The Mathematics of Attraction, I’ve seen a steady stream of Google searches for "pie in mathematics."
5. Rage report:
Despite last night’s precedent-setting new level of sleep deprivation, I’ve managed to avoid total meltdown today (so far; it’s still early). The trick seems to be to avoid housework, along with all interaction with other human beings.
One of the coping mechanisms that didn’t make the list in my most recent post is Flippancy: it takes an awful lot to turn off my faucet of lame jokes and self-mockery. I don’t know if that tactic is native to me; certainly I knew nothing of it as a teenager, when I treated all my troubles with the utmost of seriousness. I suspect I’ve learned it from my husband, for whom the adjective "earnest" is the ultimate condemnation. I’ve always had a sneaking preference for sincerity (it’s why I prefer The Joshua Tree to Achtung, Baby), yet I’ve acquired a crippling inhibition that prevents me from uttering ordinary sentiments like thanks, sympathy, or admiration.
I want to write a moving tribute to all the people who sent links in response to my rage post. Many of you pointed me to posts you had written already on this subject in the heat of the moment, while others wrote with wisdom and honesty about the dark side of mothering: not just the anger but also the guilt, frustration, and self-doubt. A little while ago I used a quote from the movie Shadowlands: we read to know we’re not alone. I’ve rarely felt more alone than when in the grip of maternal rage, and I’ve rarely felt such relief at the antidote to that sense of isolation. So instead of writing the heartfelt tribute that these posts deserve, I’ll just slap them on at the end of this dog’s breakfast of a post, and let them speak for themselves.
Three Times Three: The Ugly Truth
Rock the Cradle: Let’s go back in time
Postcards from the Mothership: Tired oh tired, yes so very very tired
Life, the Universe and Everything: Wall Rage
Write About Here (Cinnamon Gurl): The Other Mother
The Ravin’ Picture Maven: Whirling dervish
Better Make it a Double: Mother Rage
Her Bad Mother: Survivor: Child Island
Life of 'Pie: Seeing Red Stop Signs
Crunchy Carpets: Fine, I will step up to the confessional
Snickollet: The Beast Within
Mamalang: I'm a big doh head
Major Bedhead: A rotten mother
Sunday, October 15, 2006
1. Sleep report: