…why I blog.
I was so excited when Momish tagged me for the latest "five reasons" meme – but now that I’m trying to do it, I’m overcome with a Bloomian sense of belatedness. There is nothing new for me to say, no way for me to break out from the shadow of the giants who have gone before me. So I’ve decided to stop fighting it and simply steal ideas from my betters. Here is why I keep showing up around here in the blogosphere:
1) The Delights of Anticipation. Gwen described this one far better than I ever could, so I’ll just shamelessly quote her entire paragraph:
Once I watched this awful, Ritz cracker of a horror movie about innocuous household appliances run horribly amok (and we say the film industry doesn’t know how to give the people what they want. But evil lamps! What could be better?). Someone would walk innocently by the toaster and next thing you know, his hand would be holding a fork and the fork would be shimmering its way towards the metal slots and then BAM! Electrocution! I don’t know the name of the movie or when I saw it or even how the evil current was brought under control. But one of the appliances that turned dangerous was the garbage disposal. A routine dish washing would result in bloody stumps. Every single time I stick my hand down my own disposal now to pull out a lemon or extract a teaspoon, I half wonder if maybe this time the blades will go Andrew Cunanan and attack me. Every time.
That’s why I blog; because every post brings with it the possibility of some great and completely unexpected, yet oh so dramatic, outcome.
(Now go read her whole post; it’s better than mine.)
2) Increasing my Slang Vocabulary. If it weren’t for blogging, I wouldn’t even know the word "asshat." (Seriously? The one brand-new, kind-of-funny idea I had for this post was to remark on how glad I am that I blog so that I can learn words like asshat – only to find that Sage beat me to it in her post this morning.)
3) Needed Injection of Sanity. To see the blogosphere at its best, go read this post, and the comments. It redeems my faith in momkind to know that we can talk about sleep-deprivation and crying babies without judgment, that we can give advice without preaching, that we can break the stranglehold the so-called experts have on us and really communicate.
4) Compliments. No linkage here. I’ll just come out and say it: I’m in it for the compliments. Feel free to send some my way. (And while we're on the topic, does anyone else have a broken SiteMeter? Mine says I've received no visits since yesterday at 6 am, confirming my suspicion that none of you actually exist, and all my comments are being written by Jessica, my evil alternate personality.)
5) I Blog Therefore I Am. Yes, blogging is a kind of online baby book, and yes, it’s a creative outlet – but more than that, blogging is how I have figured myself out, now that motherhood has taken everything I was and altered it out of all recognition. As Lawyer Mama puts it, "motherhood, and the way it elementally changes you, is scary as hell. And so we write about it." (Sing it, sistah!)
And now that I’m overcome with anxiety about my utter inability to say anything original in response to this meme, I’ll invent my own counterpart to it:
Five Things that are NOT the Reason I Blog:
1) To prove my trendiness by showing off my fashionably clad babies.
2) To gain helpful tips on the One Best Way to parent.
3) To record every single cute thing that comes out of my children’s mouths (though I do save some up for you guys occasionally, ’cause I know how much you love them).
4) To make up for my lack of success in all others spheres of life (well, okay, that one kind of is why I blog…).
5) To avoid spending time with my husband and children. (That’s a side effect, not a motive.)
I tag Mimi, Mama Thoughts – Sarah, and Planet Nomad. Why do you blog?