Thursday, March 29, 2007

Real Moms Get Sick...

…and write posts in vaguely Elmo-ish voices. (Just imagine Elmo, only more adenoidal.)

Real moms snort and sniffle, cough and wheeze.

Real moms listen to the rattle in their bronchi and find themselves hoarsely humming that Crash Test Dummies song about J. Alfred Prufrock – and are not afraid of dating themselves by saying so.

Real moms get up, make breakfast, change diapers, get dressed, grade papers, push swings, vacuum messes, fix lunch, read stories, clean cat-barf, go for walks, wipe noses, grill cheese, boil vegetables, run baths, and give tuck-ins, even when they’re feverish and can’t really breathe, because if a real mom has a virus, then chances are her day-care provider has it too, and if her day-care provider had it first, then chances are the real mom has already called in all her babysitting favours, and if she has no more sets of grandparents to call in, then she may just be too tired to think of an ending for this sentence.

Real moms find themselves gazing languidly at their children, who are screaming as they play tug-of-war with a banana that they apparently helped themselves to from the kitchen counter, and vaguely recall that they’re supposed to do something at such junctures, but can’t remember what, or bring themselves to care.

Real moms are too weary to find anyone who hasn’t done this meme already, or even to properly link to Dani, Ali, and Becky, all of whom tagged them (her?), so real mom will just say help yourself and then rest her head on the kitchen table while she decides whether to spend the rest of the two-hour nap window (a) writing mommy-blogging panel presentation, (b) running essential pre-trip errands, (c) preparing for Monday’s classes (since weekend will be spent in Kentucky doing mommy-blogging panel), or (d) sitting with her head on the kitchen table.

40 comments:

NotSoSage said...

Oh, B&P. I'm so sorry. I find it so hard to be the sole caregiver for ONE kid when I'm sick, and you have two. Ugh. I feel your pain (by half).

I hope you get better soon. I think I may tag myself for this soon...but I've got a busy weekend ahead, so it'll be Monday (and kgirl and I had a discussion about this over e-mail and I don't want to steal her thunder, since she's been legitimately tagged).

Karen said...

A real mommy here recommending kitchen table not comfy enough and if you have any strength left go to sofa and turn on TV. Real mommies also watch Pride and Prejudice on DVD (no objectionable content for anyone under 5!) while sick and lovely children can work out banana issue or not...hope you are much better in time for wild, wild fun in Kentucky. Look out for Presbyterians! Louisville is also Presbyterian central, though I am uniformed as to whether this is one of their usual times for convening (insider scoop brought to you by my Presbyterian clergy type parents -though split, they still convene.)

Tina C. said...

i hear you. i must have the same bug. i just can't seem to get enough sleep. hope the panel goes well and can't wait to hear about it. Communication conferences rock!!

Becky said...

Ugh... I wish I could run an errand for you or take your kids for a couple hours for you. Instead all I have to offer are relatively useless words of empathy.

sigh.

I can completely relate to the thoughts regarding the banana. Real moms don't always jump at the opportunity to correct a situation. Sometimes they just sit and contemplate that perhaps they should just wait and see how things play out.

I know I'm not the only Becky who stops by, but I'll try give this "real mom" thing a go.

cinnamon gurl said...

Oh dear, take care of yourself! I hope you can sleep on the way down...

Kyla said...

Oh, feel better! And I vote for keeping your head on the kitchen table...or moving to the couch even. Go sleep!

Mimi said...

kitchen tables can be so comfortable when you're too demoralized and tired to stand up. So kitchen counter it is!

Give 'em hell at the conference! (And get well soon. Poor you!)

Mommy-Like Days said...

Ugh. Sickness sucks, as does exhaustion, as does being sick right before travel, as does having no more back up. Maybe you'll get lucky, and feel better by Kentucky :)

nomotherearth said...

Hope you feel better soon! I know the pain of trying to get things done when all you want to do is sleep. Best wishes for a speedy recovery.

Beck said...

When The Baby was sick recently, she'd get worn out crossing the room and stop and rest her head on any head-level surface, like the seats of chairs. You sound much like her today. Drink lots of fluids. Put on long kid movies and half-nap on the couch. Have a nice hot shower. Get better.

Beck said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Blog Antagonist said...

Oh yes, it's running rampant through our house right now as well. THANK GOD my children are old enough that I can mostly trust them not to burn down the house if I go to bed for a while. But I remember...oh do I remember being sick with toddlers and infants. It SUCKS.

But please do try to take care of yourself. Several times I didn't, and ended up very much the worse for wear. Last week husband didn't because of work stuff and ended up in the ER.

Rest, let the kids fight and get better soon!

Lawyer Mama said...

There really is nothing worse than taking care of your kids when you're sick. Except maybe also having sick kids at the same time. Which happens about 50% of the time. The other 50%, one gets sick, then the next, and then you, just to prolong the agony.

Get some sleep. Or at least try.

metro mama said...

Feel better soon. Can't wait to hear all about Kentucky.

Bon said...

dude. get well soon.

i think real moms should get sick days, where the substitute mommy shows up like Mary Poppins and SHE watches your kids fight over the banana while you medicate with neo citron, or gin, or just a long nap. whatever.

hope Kentucky rocks.

Denguy said...

Oh, how I laugh--not at you though, with you. Okay, maybe you're not laughing, but I am, so right--laughing at you, I guess.

And, you're the only blogmom I read who keeps making me reach for the dictionary.

Aliki2006 said...

Oh real mom, I do hope you feel better soon.

Her Bad Mother said...

Oh, friend. Neo-Citran. Or, a fresh ginger/lemon brew (on the stovestop, lean over it and inhale.)

And you'll have plenty of opportunity for rest in Kentucky. I'll bring you tea myself.

Jaelithe said...

That sucks. Feel better soon.

Mad Hatter said...

D)

The answer is D).

I do hope you are feeling better soon.

slouching mom said...

So sorry. Here too. Jack has had scarlet fever -- doesn't that just sound so Victorian?

Now I've got it. I can't even get up to cross the room. It's not a nice illness.

Feel better in time for the conference!

Mary G said...

I am sending you a large steaming bowl of virtual chicken soup!

Option 4) works better if you pry one kid lose from the banana and send it for a pillow. If request is ignored, remove the banana and use that for a pillow. Plug ears.

Wishing you as speedy a recovery as possible and a great time in Kentucky.

gingajoy said...

I'll have a hot toddy waiting for you, G. And I promise not to make any messes you have to clean up, honest!

Jenifer said...

I have long thought that I need sick days even more than when I was "working" at my job.

Feel better and have a good time in Kentucky. Wait a minute. Kids are napping and you are going to run errands - you must be sick!

Take care.

The June Cleaver Diaries said...

Oh, I feel your pain. I was there two weeks ago, and it truly sucked.

Real moms schedule a massage appointment to be used once they're feeling better.

And let their husbands get up with the kids in the morning for the duration of the illness.

And keep the tv on for the kids all day long while they lie very, very still on the couch.

If this is the same bug that's been going around town for the past couple of weeks, just remember that it's only really bad for about two days. I survived on Tylenol Flu. Good luck....

bubandpie said...

Jenifer - I was wondering if anyone would pick up on that. In my sick fog brain I neglected to explain that my sister was visiting. Due to her specific special needs, she can't really be left to do everything on her own when the kids are awake, but her presence does mean I can sneak out while the kids are sleeping if I need to.

Kelly said...

I vote for the kitchen table. It's cool on a feverish head, though perhaps not the most comfortable position to rest in.

I'm sending deep waves of sympathy. I remember, vividly, trying to care for my entire family, as we were all entrenched in the throes of a rotavirus. Fun times, not.

Hope you're on the mend soon.

wordgirl said...

Playing tug-of-war with a banana. That one made me giggle.

something blue said...

It sucks to travel when you are sick. Of course it's even worse to be on mom duty while fighting a bug. When I had the flu earlier this month, I was extremely thankful for daycare.

Get better and have fun in Kentucky!

Pieces said...

I'm sorry that you are so sick. It is amazing how comfy that tabletop can feel, isn't it?

Catherine said...

I'm so sorry you're so miserable! I hope you were able to pick "rest head on table" or, better yet "rest head on pillow." Its been such a rough year for illness...

Oh, The Joys said...

Ugh! Do they EVER.

Hope you are on the mend soon.

Jamie said...

I hope you did D).

Jamie

flutter said...

Oh honey, sleep those germs away

mamatulip said...

Oh, honey. I think one of the hardest things about motherhood is being sick when your kids are clearly NOT. I hope you get some time to rest before the weekend's festivities.

Omaha Mama said...

Ack! One of my worst fears is getting really, really sick as a Mommy. I don't know how that works! I'm sorry you're under the weather, get well soon!

Heather said...

ugh..i had that twice in two months. so sorry!

you need option e) bed or couch

also i second karen's P&P viewing.

all of our (k's & mine) children refer to it as the "girl movie" and now request it when they are sick.

Momish said...

You are so right, real moms get sick A LOT. I hope you are better soon and back to running ragged at 100%!

kittenpie said...

Oh, god, I feel for you - I've got the nasty cold too and feel like dying.

Luisa Perkins said...

I'm so sorry that you are sick. Clearly you need some bookish comfort. If you love D.E. Stevenson, you might like the books published by Persephone. (Though this probably sounds like spam, I have no connection with the company!) I hope you feel better soon.