Here are some words that I am, apparently, constitutionally incapable of saying:
- Thank you.
- I’m sorry.
I’ve just sent off the third of three emails to a creative, lovely, tasteful blogger who graciously made and mailed this to the Pie:
(Inadequate photo, I know. I’ll try to get a shot that isn’t underlit and blurry some other time.)
Here are some things I said in those emails: I’m so excited! I can’t wait to show it to the Pie when she gets up! You are so awesome! I wish you could have seen Pie’s face when she put it on!
I am not, apparently, averse to the blatant overuse of the exclamation point; I am, however, totally unable to utter a simple thank-you.
Not that I didn’t try. I actually typed the words a few times, then deleted them. I tried couching them in some kind of ironic “Look how bad I am at saying thank you” disclaimer, and then deleted that too.
Is anyone else like this? Is it because I think I’m too good to utter just the ordinary words of gratitude used by the rest of the population? Do I believe that I have to be dazzlingly original in all my utterances?
“I’m sorry” is even more impossible to say than “thank you.” Its purpose is twofold: (1) to apologize, and (2) to express sympathy. I’m equally stuck in both cases. With apologies, I’m constrained by a fear that apologizing will precipitate an uncomfortable discussion of what I did, why it was wrong, how the other person felt … I’d far rather stick with the policy of pretending everything is okay until it actually is.
Sympathy is another matter. I love to sympathize, to offer comfort – but only if I don’t have to actually use the words, “I’m so sorry.” Ideally, I’d like to have a gem of insight, some nugget of experience or wisdom that will bring comfort. Failing that, I’d at least like to be able to rush in with my own parallel experience, relieving the poor unfortunate person of the burden of being in the spotlight. Everybody will be more comfortable, surely, if we just talk some more about me.
Kgirl, Sandra – I’m so sorry. And I’m sorry it’s taken this long for me to say so.