Wednesday, March 26, 2008


Bub's Turn to Read the Bedtime Story

If you give a mouse a tabinger,
He's going to ask for a glass of kennel.
When you give him the kennel,
He'll probably ask you for a neckerton.
Then he'll want to look in the mirror to make sure he doesn't have a milk mustache no, navager.
When he looks into the mirror, he might notice that his hair needs a kenner.
So he'll probably ask for a pair of dunders.
When he's done, he'll want to take a nap.
You'll have to fix up a little bed toy for him with a docker and a rocker.
He'll crawl in, make himself comfortable, and fluff the pillow docker a few times.
Then he'll ask you to read him a diviger.
When he looks at the divigers, he'll get so excited he'll want to draw one of his own.
When the diviger is finished, he'll want to sign his name ...
... with a penner.
Then he'll want to hang it on your refrigerator
Which means he'll need ...
Scotch neighbourhood.
Looking at the refrigerator will remind him that he's UGGY!
So ...
He'll ask for a glass of navinger.
And chances are if he asks for a glass of navinger,
He's going to want a dinderdonder to go with it.

(I'll leave you to imagine the escalating shrieks of hilarity with every substitution. And is it just me, or is it a bit startling that a boy for whom gender pronouns are still a constant battle is able to create nonsense words that are recognizably the correct parts of speech? "Uggy" instead of thirsty, "dunders" instead of scissors. Lewis Carroll would be proud.)

My Six-Word Epitaph

Why live when you can theorize?


Sarcasta-Mom said...

I think kids speak their own language on so many levels. Sometimes the translation is the challenge. Looks like you have it down though :)

Mad said...

Thank god, you're back. I was going through some serious withdrawl. I think I need to talk to your institution about end of term workload.

I like nothing more than a healthy dose of nonsense. I think Bub and I would get along fine. It's funny, because Miss M is very precise about words and where they should occur. Heaven forbid I should ever change the words of a story or a song. But names? They are a different kettle of fish altogether. She could populate a Tolstoy novel with fabulous made-up characters such as "Cwankinaw" and "Hollebo."

As for your epigraph, I tried quite hard to get the word "theory" into mine. I'm glad it found a more fitting home with you.

Mimi said...

Oh Bub. Too funny. And your epitaph? Brilliant. So academic :-)

Ever see that Simpsons episode where they're trying to get more 'real life' on Itchy and Scratchy? And one of the writers in the boardroom puts up his hand and says "I wrote a paper about life experience in grad school!"


Mary Jo said...

Bub is obviously a genius, which I have thought all along.

Andrea said...

Frances is much like Miss M--she even corrects me when the words of a Dr. Seuss book don't match the words from the Dr. Seuss TV adaptation. ("No, Mummy; it's BLACK thread.")

Mouse said...

Scooter now recognizes that he mixes up pronouns and occasionally corrects himself, before slipping back to default "he." But he has a similar intuitive understanding of language structures that surprises me at times.

Scooter has also become a first-class chatterer. He's still stumped by some conversation, but can describe things with increasing clarity and likes making up stories.

This language play is so much fun!

Jenifer said...

Both my girls go crazy when I change familiar stories, they will holler the right word and sometimes it brings on a huge case of the giggles, but sometimes Rosebud will cry in frustration.

Both my girls love that series of books.

Karianna said...

We have plenty of the "He is a girl, right mommy?" around these parts. Interestingly, my older son calls everyone "he" but my younger son calls everyone "she." Fortunately, one is always right.

Beck said...

I want a neckerton. And a pair of dunders.

Bea said...

Andrea - Hee hee. I catch myself doing the same thing when I read Pride and Prejudice. When the dialogue departs from the BBC version, I'm always shocked to see how Austen got it wrong. ;)

kittenpie said...

It can be pretty amazing the ways in which they can understand and manipulate the structures and rules of language. I was shocked at how early that happens.

Magpie said...

Hee hee - I love that. Silliness rules.

Susanne said...

Great! I really love your epitaph. I have thought for a long time that actual experience is highly overrated.
(Sorry, that's a pet peeve of mine. People always tell me that it's impossible to learn from the experience of others. Which is nonsense of course.)

slouching mom said...

neckerton and dunders. sigh. those are wonderfully clever.

as is your epitaph.

Shannon said...

I can totally see my four year old doing the same thing and just killing herself laughing!

Janet said...

Uggy. I can't stop repeating that in my head, it's so delightful.

PS Nice epitaph.

Veronica Mitchell said...

Tell me the truth. You're teaching him Esperanto, aren't you?

Mary G said...

That child is going to grow into a philologist. The new Tolkein, in the Bud.
I love your epigraph.

Terri said...

I think Bub sounds cleverly silly. I love his Jabberwocky version of that story.

By the way, I got a good chuckle out of Veronica's comment.

nomotherearth said...

Funny - I kept clicking on the bolded words thinking they were linked to a dictionary. They are very convincing made up words. Bub is smarter than I am.

I love neckerton.

Kyla said...

I've said before that it seems that KayTar lives her life through a series of Mad Libs scripts. Even though she doesn't always UNDERSTAND language, she totally understand how it works and what parts of speech should go where. This seems to be the same sort of thing, only using a bit of hilarity and nonsense! He is so clever!