Annoyance-Meter

Researchers have discovered that annoyance can be bad for your health. When annoyance levels are high, sufferers are more than usually prone to weight gain, heart attack, compulsive behaviour, and psychosis. As a result of these findings, doctors have developed a simple test to determine whether the annoyances in their patients' lives have reached toxic levels. Take this test to see if the annoying people in your life are putting you at risk.

Do you share a home or rental accommodations with a person who does any of the following: (Score one point for each annoying behaviour.)

• Opens the new box of cereal before the old cereal is gone?
  
• Replaces milk that has gone past its best-before date but leaves the old milk in the fridge instead of pouring it down the sink?
  
• Calls out in the middle of the night for help finding a stuffed animal that is two inches away?

Does your home feature any of the following: (Score one point for each annoying object.)

• A leaky faucet?
  
• Something expensive that looked really good in the store but doesn't look quite right in your living room but the furniture store won't take it back?
  
• A creak in the floor of the baby room that invariably awakens the entire household if someone happens to creep in during the night to check on the sleeping infant?

Do you have to do anything of the following during the next month: (Score one point for each annoying activity.)

• File your tax return?
  
• Do emissions-testing for your vehicle in order to renew your license plates?
  
• Move to a new home?

Does your workplace feature any of the following: (Score one point for each annoying task/person.)

• Morale-building group activities?
  
• Unpaid yet subtly mandatory outings?
  
• Customers?

Scoring:
Your annoyance levels have reached dangerous heights if upon completing this test you feel:
(a) Enraged that the most particularly annoying things in your life were not included.
(b) Enraged that your perfectly healthy and normal behaviours are being classified as "annoying" but an ignorant blogger scientific researcher.

Your annoyance levels are of some concern but not yet dangerous if upon completing this test you feel:
(a) Rueful.
(b) Glad that you no longer work in retail.

Although your personal annoyance levels are very low, you may be a source of annoyance to others if upon completing this test you feel:
(a) Sorry for the rest of us.
(b) Glad that you filed your tax return last month.